When Life Gets Crazy

... think 1%. 

Francesca Battistelli "Before the Crazy Kicks In"

I love the days when even before I roll out of bed, through usually sleep deprived eyes, I make time for my daily devotion. This is nothing extraordinary or extravagant, but simply simple, yet it's truly all Jesus needs from me ... simply me. After the way my Sunday ended I needed these few moments to be still and listen to get me through my Monday. 

Now my weekend was not terrible, if anything it was quite productive, but a short version goes like this {first did anybody else realize Friday was a full moon!?!? uuhhh, I could have told ya without once looking at the moon! WOAH!} ... 3 eye appointments ... 1 regional baseball game ... grocery shopping and dinner planning for the week ... double meal prep on Saturday so I didn't have to worry about dinner on Sunday ... Church ... almost 7 dozen cookies baked and frosted ... all of this busyness ending with Sunday's what could have been a delicious dinner and the perfect ending to a great weekend on the concrete in a pile of glass {let us take a moment of silence for the lost life of the meatloaf, sigh} ... improtude dinner ... tears shed ... moment of exhaustion and defeat ... JUST. NEED. TO. GO. TO. BED. ZZZzzzz!

Then I awoke to a new day, read through my devotion ... which may or may not have been forced, either way I knew I needed to start there. With this I then followed through with my normal routine of rolling out of bed, turning on Pandora, and going about getting ready as normal. As the Saturday evening happenings started replaying in my mind, "Before the Crazy Kicks In" came on and I had that moment where I still wanted to be mad but you can't help but laugh! I have lived in these moments of the first few lines of these lyrics ... 

Here I go tip toe into the kitchen
And don't you know, crash goes the coffee cup
My only chance to be still and listen
Lord, don't let, don't let the kids wake up
A little time with You, the only way to get me through the day

While everybody's crazy looks different, my crazy today started with putting my hair gel on as lotion ... twice {WHAT?!?!?! it's always a good morning when you have to take 3 showers, right?}, we can all relate to the desire for things to go as planned, the satisfaction that you are doing this thing call life like a rockstar, and of course the longing for those quiet moments to just rest. 

So this morning after God and I had our little chuckle fest, I reminded myself that life needs to be tackled 1% at a time. Much like one step at a time. Do what you can in the moment. While some days will be aces and others nothing you want to have in the record books, but if you can change today by 1% then we have made a difference. 

Be More

 

Photo Credit: Wisdom 4Winning

Over these past couple weeks as we’ve transitioned back to the school routine and into yet another phase in this thing we call life, I’ve taken great notice in the responses of our kiddos.

Our sweet ‘n sassy trailblazer (#3) started kindergarten this year and as I watched the excitement continue to grow in the weeks before the first day of school, I was prepared for the enthusiasm she would take with her, but I could not have predicted just HOW MUCH this little girl had in her! As the Mr. captured one more picture of each one of the kiddos with the school bus fast approaching, he caught {in a single moment} every bit of happy that has ever run through this girl's veins.

Without one ounce of hesitation, she raced off to the school bus and fearlessly boarded with her big sister and big brother; and in a blink of an eye they were off and the mom thoughts started racing … I wondered how it was going, I wished I could be a fly on the wall to take in every candid moment that was taking place {I love catching the moments when they are completely unaware that somebody is watching, it’s during these times you can see straight into their tender hearts :)}, and I hoped her excitement would last FOREVER!

All morning while #4 and I anxiously awaited for the bus to bring them home, I caught myself taking multiple glimpses at this moment of sheer excitement and pondering how this priceless image truly captured what it meant to be childlike. Maybe the saying should be everything you ever need to know in life can be learned from a kindergartener… heehee! Well, on that day in that moment, our 5 year old did remind me of everything that is good and true in this world around us.

The first day of school has since been more than a few weeks ago and even since that moment, I have taken notice in my own reactions and emotions. It has made me realize that as our kids have gotten older and I have seen (in them) some of the not so pleasant side-effects of the way I react to situations and that I really needed work on reigning some of these in, like over-reacting in frustration, worry, disgust, anxiousness, impatience, fear, judgement (I say over-reacting because all of these emotions are normal and we all deal with them on a daily basis, so I have been very cognitive not to discount any of these emotions in myself or our kiddos because it’s not about minimizing or ignoring these but instead working through them and knowing how to handle them).

Nonetheless, as I have worked hard to be “quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger” (James 1:19) in order to set a better example for our kiddos in how to handle these more ‘negative’ emotions, there have been times when I have be slow to share in the joy, the happy, the fun, and the excitement when instead at times like this my reactions need to be immediate! 

Seeing of our baby girl's immediate reaction to her first day of school, hit my heart like a mother-load reminding me I need to make sure I never let go of the child within that is trusting, curious, natural, fearless, simple, resilient, forgiving, kind, guileless, happy, naïve, sincere, engaged, honest, frank, energetic, candid, fun-loving, innocent, artless, and unguarded. Of course, there will be times when life will try to stifle these, but in those moments be sure to let your child out and don't hold back!

Breathe

I missed last week and I was hoping to get something up on the blog tonight but the post I've been working on just isn't ready, so it's going to have to wait. But I can't go another week without acknowledging an amazing feat we have been able to be part of these past few months. 

Our baseball family has been on quite a journey over this postseason as they brought home the 2^nd place Class 2A IHSA State Baseball trophy on Saturday, the first state baseball trophy ever in school history ... such an exciting time! So proud of these young men, sad to think this same family will not play ball together again, yet excited to think what next baseball season will bring!

I have to send a HUGE thank you to all the support that was poured into this baseball family of ours from the parents, the community, former players, and the list goes on! It truly is a family and it just keeps growing, each year births a new group of young men we get to share our lives with and although the season may only last just over 3 months they are forever a part of who we are. These guys give their heart and soul, day in an day out!

I wish I could type more but my emotions, my patience, and my attention span are shot, my reserve tank is on empty, and I have officially crashed from my adrenaline rush from these past few months. Apologies to anybody that had to deal with me over these past few days because I know I was not all with it! I feel the need to add that if you happened to see me and I seemed to be cool and calm on the surface that was only Jesus's love encompassing me and holding me together because underneath I was an emotional wreck ... all that is good within me comes from Him and I can take no credit!

What's in Store

As we are recovering from life comatose from this last week and a half of holiday fun and family time and dwelling in the moment of New Year's Resolutions (which I truly enjoy the opportunity each year to make a change, but I don't limit myself to only make a change at the start of a new year), it's relaxing to think back over the past year and get excited about what is to come.

Life is the perfect balance of learning from the past, living in the moment, and being open to opportunities of the future ALL at the same time. I try not to dwell on the past, but I do appreciate that each new day we are given is a great opportunity to make it better than than the day before. I realize I need to slow down sometimes to enjoy the moment we are currently in. AND I need not to worry about tomorrow but I do need to listen to God's whispers because His plans for my tomorrow starts with how I obey Him today.

2015 holds things that actually happened and 2016 will bring dates of specific happenings we can plan for but there will also be so many unknowns along the way. As I reflect and ponder at the start of this new year, I can only get excited about what's in store.

Highlights of 2015 - started a blog + started a new job + #4 began pre-school + welcome another niece AND nephew into this world + everything in between

Looking forward to in 2016 - turning 35 ... it's just another number in my mind, but some may see this as a milestone :) + #3 will start kindergarten + hopes to finish my Homemade Day by Day challenge + LOVING GOD + loving people + keeping life simple

For the Blog: To Do - Make - Replace - Share

mascara

mozzarella

ciabatta bread

butter

blush

almond extract

more freezer meals

Young Living distributor
italian seasoning

pumpkin pie spice

chai latte

cream cheese

bearawicka (a family favorite of the Mr.'s dad's side ... have a recipe ... need to try this out)

cough drops

concealer

blush

sunscreen

bug spray

donate hair

dryer balls

velveeta

lipstick

eye shadow

Bar Keepers Friend (kitchen sink cleaner)

bar soap

shampoo (not no-poo)

conditioner

bacon

taco sauce

apple butter

enchilada sauce

queso

ice cream
make and take classes

liquid hand soap

dish soap

chicken bouillon

cheese (any variety)

fruit snacks

crockpot meals

coconut milk

granola

granola bars

sourdough bread

wine

sauerkraut (I love this stuff, but never buy it since I'm the only one that'll eat it!)

marshmallows

hard candy

biscuits

gravy

farm fresh eggs
uses for shea butter
uses for beeswax
uses for aloe vera gel
uses for coconut oil
uses for activated charcoal

... and the list goes on but I need to make myself stop :) 

What's something you would add to the list?

Life's Full of Change

It's been a while since I have written an inspirational post and with all of the changes that have taken place lately to lead up to the start of a really big change for me personally I wanted to share about change.

With change, usually comes emotions. My girl emotions are very typical, on days they are a roller coaster and on others you'd need a case of dynamite exploding to get much of a reaction out of me. One moment the screaming children running through a destroyed house won't phase me, then the next moment I might start giggling at something one of the kids say and before you know it, my laughing has turned into crying. And if the Mr. would be observing this he most likely would be standing speechless not sure what to do, oh dear!

Today started a brand new chapter of returning to work full-time and the biggest change ... I was not returning to the classroom to teach math. While so many worries and thoughts could and should have been filling my head, my spirit has been very peaceful, eerily peaceful. The peaceful where you know for a fact you could be understandably freaking out but you're not. The peaceful where there are SO many things you could be filling your mind with and fretting over but you're not. The peaceful where you should be overwhelmed with an abundance of new information but you're not. It's in times of this kind of peace I know it's only by the Grace of God my emotions are so calm AND I am right where God wants me to be!

My emotions aren't always in check but I also know the only reason why they are right now is because I fully handed over a situation, one that started more than 4 years ago, to God and it wasn't until this last 6 months when I started praying like this ...

"God you know me best. You know me better than I know myself. You know what will work for me and what will not. If it's not for me close the door and if it is, lead me to where I need to be and take any unnecessary emotions away."

I found it very fitting as one of the praise and worship songs this past Sunday, was a favorite old hymn of mine,

It is Well with My Soul.

1. When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
   When sorrows like sea billows roll;
   Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say,
   It is well, it is well with my soul.
   • Refrain:
     It is well with my soul,
     It is well, it is well with my soul.
2. Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
   Let this blest assurance control,
   That Christ hath regarded my helpless estate,
   And hath shed His own blood for my soul.
3. My sin—oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!—
   My sin, not in part but the whole,
   Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
   Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!
4. For me, be it Christ, be it Christ hence to live:
   If Jordan above me shall roll,
   No pang shall be mine, for in death as in life
   Thou wilt whisper Thy peace to my soul.
5. But, Lord, ’tis for Thee, for Thy coming we wait,
   The sky, not the grave, is our goal;
   Oh, trump of the angel! Oh, voice of the Lord!
   Blessed hope, blessed rest of my soul!
6. And Lord, haste the day when the faith shall be sight,
   The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
   The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
   Even so, it is well with my soul.

This song was written by Horatio Spafford and has a very touching story behind it. No matter the changes that life brings, when God's on our side and we have faith in Him our soul can be at peace!

Water for the Soil (or Soul)

How to Make Your Own Watering Can

Nothing fancy for today, but I was in need of a watering can. Our 5 year old doberman, who prances around always with something in her mouth, got a hold of ours and although it does the trick I needed something more delicate to clean the leaves of our plants in the garden after the storm that came through Sunday night. So I indulged myself in a glass of Dr. Pepper at lunch today to empty the 2-liter bottle in the fridge and used a screw and cordless screw driver to put 7 small holes in the lid. 

my "sad" garden :)

2-liter squeeze bottle, great for delicate watering

our injured water can

As I cleaned off the leaves of our plants I was reminded, I might just be the worst gardener! I am very thankful (or maybe hopeful) my skills of taking care of plants has no correlation to the care I give my own children. :) I have seen some of my friends' gardens flourishing by now and the Mr. has questioned whether or not our garden is going to be worthwhile considering all the time I have put into it and the progress (or lack of) it is showing. Through all of this, instead of seeing it as a failure (I will not give up on my garden), I finally saw an avenue to touch on a heart issue I have been wanting to share.

So often we compete with one another to be better at whatever it might be and the world around us has pushed this mentality to "out do" the last person. It's all around us ... posts, pictures, stories that we see as others doing "better" at something than we are. Being a mom, dad, husband, wife, sister, brother, son, daughter, athlete, dancer, artist, crafter, singer. In our homes, at our jobs, with our friends. I mean the list goes on and on!

Here's my revelation, I am committed to live each moment to out-do myself and ONLY myself. If that means, I have a very sad looking garden this year, then next year I am up for the challenge to make adjustments and hopefully have an "unemotional" ;) looking garden next year, and maybe a happy one the following! If I made it through today wishing I could rewind and redo some of my choices as a mom, then tomorrow I will do what I can to make those choices better than they were today. If I have a desire to be better at (fill in the blank), then instead of comparing what I am doing to somebody else, I will compare it to what I have done in the past. We are always improving but don't always notice because we have our focus on how others are performing instead.

I may not always be better than others around me, but I can always be a better me!

Homemade Weed Killer(s)

Best 'weed killers' around ... AND they were definitely homemade ;-)!  For the sake of us all, I'll refrain from sharing the recipe and directions for today's post! 

These four make life crazy, chaotic, exhausting, fun, joyful, hilarious, blessed, and every other emotion each and everyday ... I mean there are 4 of them so usually it's 4 different emotions all at one time! Yikes, talk about about over stimulated emotions some days! Which is why yesterday during praise and worship at church a particular verse was perfectly timed and hit my heart like a ton of bricks, it spoke of breaking through in my expectations. We are surrounded by expectations and allow them to overpower our actions and desires. The expectations I place on my kiddos are tough and may be on days unreasonable. This song has made me reevaluate my expectations and I have notice the days I struggle with the expectations I have for myself as a mom are the days I have placed slightly out of reach expectations for my kids. It's on these days I find myself seeing them through their failed expectations rather than the affection of my unconditional love for them. This was hard for me to shallow, but a great realization!

Through all the crazy, I couldn't imagine life without these weed killers ... with each other by our sides, we are going to stand up against all those pesky weeds (in our garden and our lives) and make a world of difference!

Just a Pinch

Here it is almost 10 pm and I am just know realizing I never stopped to transform something store bought into homemade today. As I was wracking my brain of something I could post about that would be quick I decided we could use a little pick me up instead, so here is a pinch of encouragement for you and me!

It really only takes a pinch of encouragement to keep us going through the hard times, exhausting times, busy times, frustrating times, why-is-no-one-listening times! A simple gesture, a hug, act of kindness, a good deed, and lending hand can totally brighten almost anybody's day. This is something I know I could do more of and half the time I just plain forget due to the overflowing plate I always seem to be carrying around. But I have found it's on those days when I am feeling drained without much energy in my reserve tank are the days I need to do this the most.

Throughout my Homemade Day by Day process, I am realizing it has been well more than eliminating unnecessary ingredients, saving money by making it myself, and creating a healthier home for my family. I have learned so much about what makes me happy. So often we see how others do things or handle situations or what they have to give and try to mimic it because they are some one we see as happy or "have it all together". I have taken notice in the little things about me; how I respond in different situations, who I decided to talk to or not talk to and why, the gifts I have been given to bless others with, and the personal challenges I face through my flaws as a person.

We are raised to be looking out for the other person, treating others as we want to be treated, sharing with those around us, and the list goes on! The focus has very much been placed on others most of our lives, and sometimes this focus on others turns into judgement of them. The interesting thing is we cannot become who God intended us to be if we don't turn our focus onto ourselves just as much. We are each our own person to serve a purpose different than anybody else. This balance of focus truly is a delicate one, as selfish as it may seem our number one priority should be ourselves. Our service to other's will come once we have truly identified who we are.

Hear me out on this one, if we aren't doing what God wants us to do and instead doing things because it looks good on others ... we are pretty much agreeing to swim upstream the rest of our life! This doesn't mean shut everyone out and focus on only you, doing what only you want, and making sure you get your way. No, God has a plan for us and we need to turn our focus on who God created us to be and allow Him to make it even better. I have worked hard not to over analyze what others are doing and instead bring it back to "well what does that look like for me" and go from there.

Life is always going to bring challenges, hardships, frustrations, and negativity but all of those are usually the result of something that is out of our control. Positivity and encouragement, on the other hand, is not. Instead of allowing these uncontrollable circumstances stop you from succeeding, turn your focus onto something else (maybe even yourself) and see what God has in store. In might only be a pinch to start with but sometimes that's all we need.

A Bowlful of Motherhood

No there was nothing being made from scratch today, we had more important things to do. :) The kiddos are down early after a full weekend of plans and a week ready to start whether we want it to or not. So, I am finally finding time to sit down and get a post in that didn't take time away from what today was all about! This of course is happening between a few re-directions to the kiddos to go to sleep ... I would love to be in bed if I were them and I love them dearly, but please just go to sleep! ;)

A Tribute to a Village on Mother's Day

We all have a mother, here or gone, near or far, born from or adopted, lost or found, someone who has made a difference, loved us when we least deserved it, cared for us when no one else did, and the list goes on and on! I have found this last week before Mother's Day being Teacher Appreciation Week and with Father's Day right around the corner to be very fitting with how own lives are established. A mother's role is only one of the crucial parts for children to become who God intended them to be and I appreciate a day set aside to honor the role that a mother devotes her time to doing. However, as a mother of 4, Mother's Day reminds me that there is no way in a million years I could do this job (you know it's a full-time one and the job description changes without warning) on my own! On tough days I will remind myself, "Grandma had 12 children" and "Mom was a single parent for many years" which then leads me to "LET'S GO, I CAN DO THIS! There's no turning back and no giving up!" 

My grandma and my mother have both been indisputable pillars of strength and God-loving examples of the Proverbs 31 woman! Yes, we all have our shortcomings, our insecurities, circumstances we'd wish were different, and things we would change if given a second chance; but when it is all said and done it's all about who is seen in us through our child's eyes. It's this image that will last a lifetime and be the rock of who they will become! Thanking God for the examples He has placed in my life.

When one stops and takes notice of all the examples that have molded them into who they are, it's hard not to remember the phrase "it takes a village to raise a child"! I have thought of this quote often and firmly believe in the value each person we come in contact has on our life. It is for this reason I would also like to thank all of the women that are 'moms' to our children at any given time, on any given day, knowingly or unknowingly, you are making a difference!

Happy Mother's Day!